What the hell are my dogs barking at?
We have two yippy little Schipperkes at our house, fuzzy black Belgian dogs with pointy ears and a real commitment to defending their turf. Loki and Trixie are territorial barkers - if a life form strays too close within the Schipperke Zone of Protection they start loudly barking. This can be deeply annoying, particularly since if one of the dogs starts barking, the other dog will join in, even if it has no idea what the first dog is barking about. They're quite daft.
And yet sometimes, when I let them out in the backyard late at night to do their dog thing, I wonder... what the hell are my dogs barking at?
We live in a quiet neighborhood out in the sticks. At night it is very still and peaceful (except for my dogs going apeshit in the backyard). You wouldn't think there would be all that much for a dog to bark at, and yet bark they do.
But at what?
If I'm being honest, they bark at cats, raccoons, other barking dogs, and the occasional coyote. Nothing sinister.
And yet sometimes I feel a sense of dread when I hear my dogs barking in the night. What do their doggy senses perceive out there that I cannot? On some nights, when the wind blows and the dogs begin baying into the blackness, I think they are barking at John Carpenter's Vampires.
I have felt this way ever since we got the dogs. Everyone knows that dogs are excellent detectors of vampires, Terminators, and Batman. What if the next time I let the dogs out to pee late at night and they start to bark they are actually trying to warn me that John Carpenter's Vampires are approaching?
Those brave dogs could be buying my family valuable seconds to escape - if I listen to their warning.
Why John Carpenter's Vampires? I don't know. God help me, I don't know.
Laugh at the paranoid blogger with bad taste in movies all you like. But the next time your dog starts barking for no reason, I dare you to ask yourself: "Is my pet trying to warn me of an impending attack by (vampire/cyborg/Batman)?"
Probably not. But can you afford to be wrong?
And yet sometimes, when I let them out in the backyard late at night to do their dog thing, I wonder... what the hell are my dogs barking at?
We live in a quiet neighborhood out in the sticks. At night it is very still and peaceful (except for my dogs going apeshit in the backyard). You wouldn't think there would be all that much for a dog to bark at, and yet bark they do.
But at what?
If I'm being honest, they bark at cats, raccoons, other barking dogs, and the occasional coyote. Nothing sinister.
And yet sometimes I feel a sense of dread when I hear my dogs barking in the night. What do their doggy senses perceive out there that I cannot? On some nights, when the wind blows and the dogs begin baying into the blackness, I think they are barking at John Carpenter's Vampires.
I have felt this way ever since we got the dogs. Everyone knows that dogs are excellent detectors of vampires, Terminators, and Batman. What if the next time I let the dogs out to pee late at night and they start to bark they are actually trying to warn me that John Carpenter's Vampires are approaching?
Those brave dogs could be buying my family valuable seconds to escape - if I listen to their warning.
Why John Carpenter's Vampires? I don't know. God help me, I don't know.
Laugh at the paranoid blogger with bad taste in movies all you like. But the next time your dog starts barking for no reason, I dare you to ask yourself: "Is my pet trying to warn me of an impending attack by (vampire/cyborg/Batman)?"
Probably not. But can you afford to be wrong?
This entry was posted by David Campbell, on
Tuesday, April 21, 2009.
You can leave your response.
April 22, 2009 8:22 AM
Dude, we have two little Pekingese who do the EXACT SAME THING. Sometimes, late at night, they'll just randomly start barking in the direction of our back door, behind which is a back yard and then an alley, and I always get an adrenaline rush as though I'm about to go toe-to-toe with a home invader.
But I never considered John Carpenter's Vampires. Hurm.
April 22, 2009 9:58 AM
Schipperkes vs John Carpenter's vampires - Dave my man, bring on the fanfic.
But it's gotta be J.Carp's vampires, otherwise you're risking it coming out like Beverly Hills Chihuahua meets Twilight. And nobody wants to see that...
April 22, 2009 1:55 PM
Actually, my unreasonable fears are that the dog is staring and barking at either a Ray Harryhausen stop-motion skeleton warrior, a Martian from that 1950's War of the Worlds movie, or an H.R. Giger alien.
It's mostly just rabbits, though. Mostly.
April 22, 2009 2:23 PM
I have an Akita -- a dog breed that almost never barks. Now, thanks to Dave, I'm going to be really, REALLY preoccupied whenever he starts barking.
P.S.: glad to have you back. Although I don't comment much, I really enjoy your posts (ever since the Long Box).
April 23, 2009 4:25 PM
Well, you gotta remember dogs also bark at Terminators and zombies. And recent studies indicate they may bark at other works of the writer of the original novel John Carpenter's Vampires is based on (Vampire$, by the way).
It could be the dogs are barking at an abandoned copy of John Steaky's Armor. Good book, incidentally.
April 24, 2009 4:24 AM
there's something funny about it being specifically john carpenter's vampires.
I know vaguely what it is, but have stopped myself from pursuing it any further for fear that I'll make the magic disappear